2021 Week In Review - Week 3
Nov 7, 2021 17:45:36 GMT -5
Oslo Mastodon, Moscow Red Army, and 8 more like this
Post by Morweena Reimnoceri on Nov 7, 2021 17:45:36 GMT -5
DHL Week In Review - Week 3
Matchups:
Morween (2-0-0) v. Vegas (1-1-0) - Morweena wins 11 - 1
Nebraska (1-1-0) v. Simi Valley (1-1-0) - Simi Valley wins 7.5 - 4.5
Oslo (1-1-0) v. Melbourne (1-1-0) - Oslo wins 7 - 5 (lol)
Castleford (0-1-1) v. St. Roch (1-1-0) - St. Roch wins 7.5 - 4.5
Portland (1-0-1) v. Tampa (1-1-0) - Portland wins 9.5 - 2.5
Haukiputaan (0-2-0) v. Moscow (1-1-0) - Moscow wins 12 - 0
Matchup of the Week: Oslo v. Melbourne
As Bushrangers GM Daniel already mentioned in the shoutbox (thanks for stealing my thunder) this matchup was ridiculously close. The difference came down to one shot, one STP and one block. That was the margin that the rag-tag bunch of survivors from Oslo won by. I gotta say, it’s a real testament to the depth that the Mastodon has built up to be able to overcome so many injuries and still have a winning record. I, for one, am not looking forward to having to deal with this team at full strength.
Performance of the Week: Moscow Red Army (17 goals, 36 assists, +28, 138 shots, 18 STP, 64 hits, 70 blocks, 20:31 TOI, 3 wins, 0.67 GAA, 89 saves, .978 SV%)
That’s right y’all, Big Red took the entire thing this week. Haukiputaan can probably attest to the week that was put up against him. Of course, generally when your big boys show up to play (Matthews and Marner) and your goalies go beat mode you’re going to have a very favourable stat-line when the final buzzer goes.
Player of the Week: Leon Draisaitl (5 goals, 5 assists, +6, 13 shots, 3 STP, 1 hit, 21:25 TOI)
Ho-hum...10 points for Draisaitl. What an absolute freak this guy is. I have really run out of things to say about him so I’m going to try and take him down a peg or two. He may be skilled at hockey but I bet he’s bad at making tiramisu. He may be strikingly handsome, but I bet that his farts smell worse than my dog’s. There, that’ll do it.
Leon did that in 3 games too.
3 Stars:
1) Jack Campbell (3 GP, 3 wins, 0.99 GAA, 92 saves, .968 SV%)
2) Mitchell Marner (2 goals, 7 assists, +4, 12 shots, 4 STP, 1 block, 21:45 TOI)
3) Auston Matthews (4 goals, 2 assists, +4, 14 shots, 4 STP, 2 hits, 5 blocks, 20:50 TOI)
Other Notes:
Quack, quack, quack - Four Ducks players were scooped up out of free agency this week. Kevin Shattenkirk, Cam Fowler, Adam Henrique, and Troy Terry were signed by St. Roch, Morweena and Castleford respectively - most surprisingly of the trio was Terry going for a whopping $6 / 3 years after being cut free by the Red Army. I would also like to acknowledge and thank Mr. Shattenkirk for the Edible Arrangement he sent us here at the office, and you’re welcome.
MastoDOWN - The wounded get wounded-er as Oslo had Laine and Crosby added to their injured list earlier in the week. I can confirm that while it would be an incredibly frustrating experience if it were me, I find a great bit of joy in seeing Oslo struggle with injuries yet continuing to win.
Jack of Spades - In case you’ve not looked at any sort of hockey related internet since Thursday, Jack Eichel finally got traded to Vegas this week. This is a huge step forward for our Coyotes franchise in regards to getting their prized free agent centreman into the fold. It’s also crazy to think that over the last few years the Golden Knights have (via trade or free agency) landed Stone, Pacioretty, Pietrangelo, Lehner, and now Eichel. Not bad for an expansion team.
McJesus - Did everyone see that McDavid goal vs the Rangers? Was it his best? It’s up there.
Morweena’s Mailbag:
Q: How are you doing?
A: I...I’m good. Thank...you…?
Q: After now losing Crosby (again), Nino, and now seeing Bobrovsky leave the ice, I believe I may have unknowingly disrupted or angered an ancient spirit.
As an agnostic believer, what religious figure should I be sacrificing for in order to get some healthy players?
Signed, Hopeless in Salem
*editor’s note - since getting this question, Laine and Mantha have gone on the IR and Sergachev has been suspended 2 games
A: Whenever I find myself cursing my luck I lean towards doing one of two things; cutting my losses and quitting or making knee-jerk overreactions to try and right the issue. So, how does this relate to you and which would I suggest? Since quitting just makes things harder for the rest of the league to continue, I’m going to go with knee-jerk overreaction for this scenario. And what would that be? Glad you asked. Make trades. Big ones. Take all those red flag guys and ship them out to say...Morweena...for whatever that manager deems fair. That or sacrifice a goat into a volcano.
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